心痛

心好痛

又一个member离去

她就只是一个14岁的小女生

为什么就要受到这种待遇？

太不公平了吧？

乖巧的她

很多事都没有尝试过

但

就这样

离开了

我以为我会没事

因为毕竟不是很熟

但是

当我一转身离开食堂

一颗眼泪却失控地掉下了

给白金时

看见她妈妈伤痛地哭着

心痛不已

可是

她永远都不会从她的睡梦中唤醒过来了

可能

她真得太累了吧

又是细菌感染

把一个宝贵的性命夺走了

怎么就有那么多细菌？

也许

这个是让她解脱的办法吧

秀娟

安息吧

你会是我们心目中的好member

佩敏

我想你在另一边过得很好吧？

记得照顾你的学妹，秀娟

你也不会在寂寞了吧

你们

要开心

5.26pm

26.05.2009

COUNTDOWN FOR MY COMPETITION

sigh```
8 hours more i need to take part in my competition ler.
华语演讲比赛~

SIGH```
long time didn't take part in this type of compatition already~
now still want to representative school tim~
lolx.
sure that i will be the last ler.
i didn't prepared well ler.
time to die~
hope that tomorrow i won't forget about the contents ler.

lolx~
quite nervous now~
hope that tomorrow i will have a good performance.
don't be nervous~
hoho~

i can hear the sound of my heart beat now~
argh~ man, stop to be nervous anymore.

today~
saw the cute guy again ler.
THE SECOND CLONE OF HIM!
he really cute~
damn cute.
finally i saw he smile~
he really look like him ler~
the way they smiling and talking~
lolx.
are they brothers?
hahax...
cute dou bOOm~

have a happy time with my friends today~
hoho~ playing and joking arround at canteen after school~
damn funny.
hahax.
love them much!
muakx...
=*

need to continud my practice now~
ganbateh nehx.
wooHOo```
weeEEEE~
hope that i can do it!

== HAPPY TEACHER'S DAY ==

12.13a.m
16.03.2009

ACTUALLY WE CAN DO IT WELL

sigh```
finally, all of us need to say goodbye to formation competition already~
this journey stop at here.
a fullstop for that~
sigh```
damn sad!

after finishing the formation performance.
i cried~
sigh```
because i sure that we lose already~
we didn't did our job well today~
totally bad.
i also don't know what had happened to us~
damn messy ler...
during the marching performance.
i can heard the sound of broken heart~
[PRANG]

sorry for let all of you disappointed ler.
thanks for supporting us~
thanks a lot.
but i failed to do it!
even third place also can't get~
my tears keep on dropping.
really sad ler.
last year for me, but that's the end ler.

moody~
along the way back to school~
i didn't say any words also ler.
just sit at my place silently.
really sad till speechless.
sigh````````

today~
don't want to say anything ler.
too moody.
who knows my feelings?

yesterday, celebrate mother's day at home.
cook for my mother.
she looks happy~
the taste is not bad also ler.
prepared a jelly and chicken for mama.
and buy a cake also ler.
a memorable mother's day.

sigh````
too sad already~
today fall down also ler.
sucks!!
>_<
don't know what i am writing now~
stop here.

i don't want to cry~
be tough~
my friends, thanks for caring ler~
i appreciate it!
thanks.

5.36pm
11.05.2009

GUESSING

SIGH```
start with this words again...
my mood not so good now~

facing my health problem again!
lolx.
sick again narx.
finally go and see a doctor.
keep on fever and fever.
everytime when i thought that i recover already.
but, those damn virus come towards me again narx.
suckx.>_<

pity me.
sigh``so tired recently.
busy in reading my script to take part in competition.
busy in preparing my exam.
busy in practising in my marching.
sigh``
quite tired, man!

sigh```
my mood is not good because of feeling not well...
add on~
keep on guessing in something that not important.
lolx.
just try to control my mind for not thinking of it anymore.
but, when i heard that.
my mood became bad~lolx.

not start to do my revision yet~
suckx.
lazy me ler.
i dont want to fail in my exam.
i want pass it will flyign colours ler.
gonna start reading right now~
no more lazy is allowed!

damn!
stop guessing it~
because it is non of my business...

== suckx ==
== feel sleepy in class ==
== stupid medicine affceting me from paying attention in class ==

11.30pm
05.05.2009

思念已故的契妈

你的离开已有大概三个月了。

并不是很习惯这种生活~

沉重的心情。。。。

前天，

梦见了她。

她，消瘦了。

冷酷了。

梦里的她，没有给我任何回应。

冷漠的把我的心给冻结了~

好痛~

这一点一滴的痛，

已经足以让我致命~

不知她在厨房忙碌着什么。

他的冷漠，根本让我失去勇气去接近。

心想，从前热情的她，去那里了？

眼泪，往心里流~

不久，来了三名不明人士。

把她带走。

她，没留下任何一句话。

就随他们他出家门了。

不想再有任何遗憾的我，

冲上前去，向她道歉。

“是我不孝，没有好好孝顺过你，对不起，真得很对不起。”

契妈没给任何反应我。

以让冷冰冰的望着我。

眼睛，再也撑不住眼泪的重量。

直往下流~

“能给我最后的拥抱吗？”

这也是我最后的请求~~

当我抱着她的那一刻，

我。。。

才发现，原来契妈的身体早已变得僵硬。

甚至。。。冰冷。

我呆了，

但，

仍然不愿放手~

这个冰冷的拥抱~

却温暖了我的心房。。。

好温暖~

那种温暖，我不懂得如何形容~

这个，已经是属于我们两个最后的拥抱了。

我，没有遗憾了。。。。。。。

才发现。。

原来，

我的脸早已被我的泪水沾湿了脸。。

从睡梦中惊醒过来。。。

原来，

这一切，

只是一场梦~

这是我十七年以来，

第一次从梦中哭醒。

契妈，

我是多么的想念你。

我是多么的想见你~

我是多么的想跟你说一句：我爱你

你的怀抱，是如此的温暖。

你的臂腕，是如此的舒服。

你的笑容，是如此的慈祥。

你的性格，是如此的坚强。

我爱你

这个梦，也许对大家来说是个不切实际的梦。

但是，

这个梦，是唯一能让我弥补我的遗憾的梦。

它对我的意义是如此的庞大。

它仿佛重复的提醒着我

你的离去已是事实

你已经永永远远离开我们

放心

我会好照顾契爸

别担心

这已经是我们之间的

最后一个拥抱

10.38a.m

05.05.2009

YOU MAKE ME IN MOOD

my mood become better if compare with this morning.
at least for now, no need to worry so much for my competition first~
i think you all can get what all i say ba~

actually i not sure how is my feeling now~
i really give up already??
or i am just telling myself not to thinking of it?
i can't find any good answer for it~
that's why i don't want to find out the answer...
add on, i can't find any answer for it```

woohoo``
you make me in mood , man!
you are funny and cute . .
i love you so much, my friends.
hahax.XD

tomorrow my two pretty mUi will organised an anniversary.
hahax. .
yau mUi be mc tomorrow.
she seems like so nervous.
keep on asking me how to be a good mc.
just try my best to tell her all of my ideas.
just hope that it will helps her a lot ler.
ganbateh nehx!
you can do it!

and wenxin mUi```
i sure that others leos will like your booklet also ler.
=)

still not yet make a decision to go for leo anniversary or not ler```
hehex...XD
maybe will go geh..
go and support my mUi s...

today, i feel want to dating.
haha..
at least, when i feel not happy, have somebody to chat with me...
accompany me...
and . . . lend a shoulder to me.
but, actually i biasa to be single already.
but, just hope that someone will accompany me when i am lonely or sad.
whatever narx.
don't dream anymore.
hahax. pity me~
nobody wants me...T_T

whatever narx...
i would like to concentrate in my studies more ler```
hiak hiak~

i love myself!
my heart belongs to me.XD

** GIVE UP ALREADY? **

10.28 pm
01.05.2009